Guatemala: Day 75
Hi lovelies! My mom left on Monday morning this week and it was a really sad goodbye for both of us because we don't know exactly when we'll see each other again. I really want to write about our experiences travelling around Guatemala but I have had something else on my mind that I would like to write about first.
If you haven't heard or seen, there is a video circulating around about a woman in France that confronted a man that was catcalling and making remarks about her appearance. We can't hear their conversation but after she responds to his harassment he slaps her across the face! So many things make me angry about this situation but mostly that this clearly shows how hard it is for women to stand up to sexual harassment because at the back of our minds we all know that the person we are addressing is (most likely) physically stronger than us and can really hurt us. But then is the solution to simply put up with it?
I have been in numerous situations here in Guatemala where I have thought about confronting men on the street. I am not exaggerating when I say that I get whistled at about 3 times a day, someone will call at me at least once and I get a lot of honking from passing by traffic. This is not including the looks I get. And just to put this in perspective, my walk to work is 5 minutes long! So in a day I walk about 10-20 minutes (if I also go to the gym) and in that time I experience that much street harassment. I think that some people in Latin America (not only men) think that this is supposed to be flattering, when in reality it makes me feel like an object!
So I have adjusted my behaviour and demeanour. Firstly, I have let it affect the way I dress. The whole 3 months I have been here I have worn a dress in Guatemala City once and never shorts or skirts. I am highly aware that I would draw more attention if I abandoned my loyal jeans and long pants. Oh and don't even get me started on crop tops! I wore one to the gym once and felt so vulnerable and uncomfortable the whole walk over. Secondly, I try to keep my gaze down or fixed directly ahead when I walk down the street as to not "entice" the men with looking into their eyes. That sounds absolutely ridiculous!!! I sound like I'm a handmaid from Handmaid's Tale. I get so angry at myself for letting these men change how I behave and I have been very close to walking up to them and telling them off.
Actually, I did once. Me and my mom were in Antigua walking down the street and I saw someone from the corner of my eye. He was in a small store and the doors were open so he had a good view to the street. As I was slowly passing by the store, I noticed him moving his phone, pointed at me, at the same pace as I was walking and I stopped. Was he filming me, I thought? I gave him a really angry stare and only after a few seconds he lowered his phone. I yelled at him "Are you filming me?" in Spanish. And to be honest I will never know if there is a video out there of me walking down a street in Antigua because he simply shrugged and put the phone away. I felt really angry for a while but it was also liberating to stand up to him and at least let him know that I saw him. There is a little hope in me that next time he thinks about doing that to another woman he will remember my angry face yelling at him and he will not do it.
However, this story could have ended very differently. Maybe if the guy was aggressive, I was completely alone or it had not been in the middle of the day I could have been seriously hurt. This combined with the overall somewhat insecure environment in the country (most evident in Guatemala City) could have changed everything. And that is something I can't shake off when I'm walking in the country's capital. Although I am frustrated at the street harassment and how it affects me, I value my physical well-being and life more highly so I have stayed quiet. I really wish I didn't have to choose.
If you haven't heard or seen, there is a video circulating around about a woman in France that confronted a man that was catcalling and making remarks about her appearance. We can't hear their conversation but after she responds to his harassment he slaps her across the face! So many things make me angry about this situation but mostly that this clearly shows how hard it is for women to stand up to sexual harassment because at the back of our minds we all know that the person we are addressing is (most likely) physically stronger than us and can really hurt us. But then is the solution to simply put up with it?
I have been in numerous situations here in Guatemala where I have thought about confronting men on the street. I am not exaggerating when I say that I get whistled at about 3 times a day, someone will call at me at least once and I get a lot of honking from passing by traffic. This is not including the looks I get. And just to put this in perspective, my walk to work is 5 minutes long! So in a day I walk about 10-20 minutes (if I also go to the gym) and in that time I experience that much street harassment. I think that some people in Latin America (not only men) think that this is supposed to be flattering, when in reality it makes me feel like an object!
So I have adjusted my behaviour and demeanour. Firstly, I have let it affect the way I dress. The whole 3 months I have been here I have worn a dress in Guatemala City once and never shorts or skirts. I am highly aware that I would draw more attention if I abandoned my loyal jeans and long pants. Oh and don't even get me started on crop tops! I wore one to the gym once and felt so vulnerable and uncomfortable the whole walk over. Secondly, I try to keep my gaze down or fixed directly ahead when I walk down the street as to not "entice" the men with looking into their eyes. That sounds absolutely ridiculous!!! I sound like I'm a handmaid from Handmaid's Tale. I get so angry at myself for letting these men change how I behave and I have been very close to walking up to them and telling them off.
Actually, I did once. Me and my mom were in Antigua walking down the street and I saw someone from the corner of my eye. He was in a small store and the doors were open so he had a good view to the street. As I was slowly passing by the store, I noticed him moving his phone, pointed at me, at the same pace as I was walking and I stopped. Was he filming me, I thought? I gave him a really angry stare and only after a few seconds he lowered his phone. I yelled at him "Are you filming me?" in Spanish. And to be honest I will never know if there is a video out there of me walking down a street in Antigua because he simply shrugged and put the phone away. I felt really angry for a while but it was also liberating to stand up to him and at least let him know that I saw him. There is a little hope in me that next time he thinks about doing that to another woman he will remember my angry face yelling at him and he will not do it.
However, this story could have ended very differently. Maybe if the guy was aggressive, I was completely alone or it had not been in the middle of the day I could have been seriously hurt. This combined with the overall somewhat insecure environment in the country (most evident in Guatemala City) could have changed everything. And that is something I can't shake off when I'm walking in the country's capital. Although I am frustrated at the street harassment and how it affects me, I value my physical well-being and life more highly so I have stayed quiet. I really wish I didn't have to choose.
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